New things
Trying to start, once again.
Struggling.
Notes for myself: When working on a project, if unable to finish, clean 50%, leave 50% "out to finish later." But only if you are ACTUALLY going to finish.
Neighbor: druid/presbyterian. I get it. I like how nature-worship and judeo-christian worship overlap, I think God does show himself to us best through his creation, nature. Hmm.
Types and stereotypes: rocker-hippie? SCA academic? I live on the borderlands, unable to be quantified.
At least, that is my goal: To be unique. To challenge pre-conceptions.
Too busy with "Life" to have any energy over to challenge anything. Overwhelmed. Is this what 'adulthood' is? Never enough money, never enough work, too many bills, too many aches and pains, too many exceptions. Forms, paperwork, punctuality. A corpse-ified machine. That's what this 'adulthood' seems to be, to me. I don't like it, I don't want it, I don't want my spirit to die.
But then all those little shortcuts I take, all the unfinished file-trails, all the little luxuries, and hobbies, and exceptions I allow my spirit, add up. And get in the way of things like "having enough money for food," because 95% of our money HAS to go for food & gas, so you can't afford a $5 ice cream. I feel like I hate everything, but I know that's a lie.
Anyway.
Have to go, to a 3-hour pointless meeting, for a job I am leaving in a week. What a pointless waste. But I get paid.
Struggling.
Notes for myself: When working on a project, if unable to finish, clean 50%, leave 50% "out to finish later." But only if you are ACTUALLY going to finish.
Neighbor: druid/presbyterian. I get it. I like how nature-worship and judeo-christian worship overlap, I think God does show himself to us best through his creation, nature. Hmm.
Types and stereotypes: rocker-hippie? SCA academic? I live on the borderlands, unable to be quantified.
At least, that is my goal: To be unique. To challenge pre-conceptions.
Too busy with "Life" to have any energy over to challenge anything. Overwhelmed. Is this what 'adulthood' is? Never enough money, never enough work, too many bills, too many aches and pains, too many exceptions. Forms, paperwork, punctuality. A corpse-ified machine. That's what this 'adulthood' seems to be, to me. I don't like it, I don't want it, I don't want my spirit to die.
But then all those little shortcuts I take, all the unfinished file-trails, all the little luxuries, and hobbies, and exceptions I allow my spirit, add up. And get in the way of things like "having enough money for food," because 95% of our money HAS to go for food & gas, so you can't afford a $5 ice cream. I feel like I hate everything, but I know that's a lie.
Anyway.
Have to go, to a 3-hour pointless meeting, for a job I am leaving in a week. What a pointless waste. But I get paid.
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