Why being skinny bothers me.
So. I have lost a bunch of weight, without trying to. In Jr. High, I wore size 12-14 jeans, High School I was 10-12, after High School I had 2 specific episodes of shrinking, and then the last 2 years where I NEVER STOP shrinking. I am now about a size 2-4.
When I complain about losing weight, I get scolded by women telling me to shut up, or I should be grateful, or that millions of women wish they had my problem, etc. Most often they just give me "the look." Men, you know what I'm talking about - that "are you serious / you're an idiot" look us women perfect so well.
But it REALLY bothers me. And I think I finally put my finger on what it is that bugs me so badly.
I was happy with my weight before, and I felt healthy. I have spent my whole life railing against the media's portrayal of beauty as being stick-thin and unhealthily anorexic, and trying to accept my own beauty, and get other women to accept their own beauty. I achieved that... when I was larger. Now that I'm thinner, I am sort of like a poster girl for that media-anorexic-beauty that I HATE so much! And everytime a women compliments me on my size and says it's a good thing, it's like a knife in my gut.
I am NOT healthy at the size I am now. I do not feel healthy, and I have numerous health problems. Also, I lost some of my curves (breast tissue & butt) when I lost weight too. I LIKED my curves where they were. I feel LESS attractive now. I am trying to gain weight back in a HEALTHY way which I have no idea how to do. Losing weight is pretty straightforward - as far as diet & exercise go. How do you put on weight while still being healthy? I don't wanna just sit on my butt and eat 30,000 calories of ice cream a day, and I don't have the funds/time/energy to workout for hours a day.
But mostly I HATE that women see me as an ideal when I disagree with that ideal SO vehemently! It makes me sick to my stomach. Love your curves ladies! You are beautiful as you are!
Dove's Campaign for Real Beauty
http://www.dove.ca/en/default.aspx#/cfrb/
Glamour Magazine's REAL women
http://www.glamour.com/health-fitness/blogs/vitamin-g/2009/09/on-the-cl-are-you-ready-to-sta.html
When I complain about losing weight, I get scolded by women telling me to shut up, or I should be grateful, or that millions of women wish they had my problem, etc. Most often they just give me "the look." Men, you know what I'm talking about - that "are you serious / you're an idiot" look us women perfect so well.
But it REALLY bothers me. And I think I finally put my finger on what it is that bugs me so badly.
I was happy with my weight before, and I felt healthy. I have spent my whole life railing against the media's portrayal of beauty as being stick-thin and unhealthily anorexic, and trying to accept my own beauty, and get other women to accept their own beauty. I achieved that... when I was larger. Now that I'm thinner, I am sort of like a poster girl for that media-anorexic-beauty that I HATE so much! And everytime a women compliments me on my size and says it's a good thing, it's like a knife in my gut.
I am NOT healthy at the size I am now. I do not feel healthy, and I have numerous health problems. Also, I lost some of my curves (breast tissue & butt) when I lost weight too. I LIKED my curves where they were. I feel LESS attractive now. I am trying to gain weight back in a HEALTHY way which I have no idea how to do. Losing weight is pretty straightforward - as far as diet & exercise go. How do you put on weight while still being healthy? I don't wanna just sit on my butt and eat 30,000 calories of ice cream a day, and I don't have the funds/time/energy to workout for hours a day.
But mostly I HATE that women see me as an ideal when I disagree with that ideal SO vehemently! It makes me sick to my stomach. Love your curves ladies! You are beautiful as you are!
Dove's Campaign for Real Beauty
http://www.dove.ca/en/default.aspx#/cfrb/
Glamour Magazine's REAL women
http://www.glamour.com/health-fitness/blogs/vitamin-g/2009/09/on-the-cl-are-you-ready-to-sta.html
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